The Scarlett Letter

October 14, 2010

Think Before You Pink

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:56 am
Tags: , , , , ,

It’s October. Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Women, and men, are wearing head-to-toe pink: Pink shirts, pink hats, pink scarves, pink shoes, pink underwear (I assume). You go to your nearest big box store and buy pink cooking pans, pink tools, pink cans of soup. Any and every thing you could want or need is available in baby pink this time of the year. Some products even have a little pink ribbon on them and say “Support Breast Cancer Awareness.” But what does this really mean?

pink electronics women

THINK BEFORE YOU PINK! Read the label closely before you put that pink box of cereal in your cart. Sure it has that wonderful phrase “Support Breast Cancer Awareness” on it, but how do they do it? Do they send a portion of their proceeds to respected organizations like Susan G. Komen for the Cure? Do they provide support for employees diagnosed with the terrible disease or who have family members fighting? Or do they simply want you to show your support by just having a pink box of cereal in your pantry? I mean, who’s going to see that special carnation colored box of Fruity O’s? And when your kids pull out that box, are they going to look at it and run out and tell all their neighbors to go get a mammogram? Or will they say “Oh! It’s pink! Pretty! Now where’s the toy inside???”

Now if you were going to buy that cereal anyway, or picked it up because it’s the same price as another brand but they say they donate 2% of sales to Komen for the Cure or something, by all means, please still do. Every little bit helps. But if you’re considering paying $5,000 more for a pink car to show your support… I say slam the brakes on that one! Or, if that pink soup, sneakers, toaster or whatever, isn’t on sale, buy the one that is, take the difference and write a check to Komen or another trustworthy organization. You and the charities would be better off if you donate that money directly to those who need it most. Plus it’s much easier to track a lump sum rather than 2% from some shampoo or 5% from a camera when tax time comes along.

Go on and keep buying those pink watches, water bottles and cups of yogurt. But think about if doing so is really helping to find a cure or care for those battling breast cancer, or helping executives pay for that yacht in the Caribbean.

October 4, 2010

Miss Scarlett’s Halloween Ideas – 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:11 am
Tags: , , , , ,

If you haven’t checked your calendars yet friends, we’re now well into October. That means Halloween is just a few weeks away. And this year, it falls on a Sunday, which means there are sure to be plenty of parties Saturday night.

Being a woman of color, there weren’t too many real-life options for costumes for me in my younger years. Yeah, I could have been a Black Barbie or Black Dorothy Hammil or Black Madonna, but still, I wanted to be someone and not have to put use the word “Black” as a prefix. Wait, was Michael Jackson still Black during my trick-or-treating days? Not sure. So I’ve come up with a few costume ideas for my fellow Brothas and Sistas. Some of them are quite scary… on a number of levels. Oh, and a warning for people of non-color, please do not attempt to wear these costumes while donning Black face. It’s NOT a good look!

BISHOP EDDIE LONG:

There are a few options you can go with should you desire to dress as Bishop Long, now making headlines for allegedly having sexual relations with teenaged boys.

Look#1 – Like Coffee, Black and HOT!!!- It is easy to achieve this look! Just grab a black Under Armour muscle tee, black bike shorts, black Kangol hat, your iPhone and add some facial hair. You may also accessorize with a pair of gym socks if you so desire. I don’t need to tell you where to wear them.

Look #2 - Red Means Don’t Stop – This one is also easy to create. Just grab a way too small red Under Armour tee, faded black jeans, a gold chain, and again, your iPhone. Once again, gym socks are optional.

Look #3 - The Lace Front Luva- This has to be my favorite look. Begin with– you guessed it! An Under Armour tee shirt, this time in burgundy. (I would also suggest buying a boat load of stock in Under Armour as I foresee it going up just before Halloween), wear tan suit pants and a tan vest. To achieve the hairstyle, simply take your old Michael Jackson circa Thriller wig, trim it to about the size of a yarmulke, and just plop it on your head. Make sure to pull a few little curls out over your forehead for that extra pizzazz.

 

MO’NIQUE:

This is a REAL easy one ladies!  Wear a beautiful evening gown, pull your hair up into a gracious bun, and maybe add the gardenia in the hair like Mo’nique wore when she won the Oscar for Precious. Oh, forgot the most important part of the costume… THROW OUT YOUR RAZOR! Let the hair on your legs grow and grow and happily expose your hair limbs to everybody. Some of you may have needed to start preparing for this costume back in March to have adequate leg hair, but try your best.

STEVE HARVEY:

Ah Steve! I used to love him when he was simply a comedian. But now he is the scariest thing that could ever happen to a single woman! Getting all up in her bidness and all. Get yourself a brightly colored suit and some coordinating gators. Add a fire captain’s moustache and shave your head (remember, he donated his lace front wig to the Bishop who added a texturizer to it). Once you’re at the party, go up to every bachelorette and start telling her what she’s doing wrong and why she can’t get a man. And end every sentence with a hella annoying belly laugh.

BEYONCE:

Last year, Sasha Fierce’s Single Ladies‘ look was a popular costume. I had many female friends who wore the one-shouldered leotard with the metal hand glove thingy and, of course, a ring on it. Buuuuutttt… After Halloween, actually, it was last Thanksgiving night, Beyonce aired her special taped in Vegas. The spokesmodel for L’Oreal, one of the world’s leading cosmetic companies, had something funky going on with her makeup. So this year, we’re turning to her look from that as inspiration for a costume. Here’s what you do: go to the makeup counter, find your shade of foundation & powder, then go 5 shades lighter. Slap it on your face but don’t bother trying to blend it into your jaw- or hairlines. Then take jet black liquid eyeliner. Draw a super-thick line from the inner corner of your eye to your temples. Think Egyptian, but longer. Much, much longer. Finish the look with the brightest red lipstick you can find. As for the outfit, fashion it out of aluminum foil, using balloons to creat the solid poofiness at the hips. Add a long blondish wig and don’t forget your personal diva fan!

Those are just a few suggestions for you guys. And hey, if you decide to dress up as one of these scary creatures, please send me a photo! I just might post it!

September 23, 2010

Status Update

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:42 am
Tags: , , ,

The other night, I was Skyping one of my friends. In the middle of me telling Julie on my big score at the sales rack, she suddenly starts beaming. Sure, I was excited to save 85% on my buys, but I never expected Julie to be that excited!

“I’m sorry,” Julie says, still grinning from ear to ear, “I just checked Facebook and it says this guy I had a crush on back in the day is now SINGLE!”

“Who is it?” I ask.

“Frank.”

I too break out with a huge Chesire Cat reminiscent grin. Oh, I remembered Frank well. Julie knows I had a crush on Frank, as did a number of other women in the office at our first job. Tall, muscular, emerald eyes, dark chocolate hair… But I digress.

Without pausing for a beat, I open my browser and go to Facebook to see if what Julie said is true. There it is. A little pink heart. Right beneath the words “Frank Smith is now single.” Julie and I exchange fist pumps (Yeah, time to turn off Jersey Shore!).

But then it hit me, was it wrong to celebrate while Frank may be in sorrow? I remember stalking looking at pictures of Frank happily hugged up with his unbelievably cute and sexy blonde girlfriend. Those pictures were up for at least a year. Frank may be crying into a glass of Jack Daniels while Julie and I are doing the Cabbage Patch in celebration of his newly found singledom.

Why do we find such joy in someone’s sorrow? Simple! Because it allows us to reignite fantasies about that person. Hoping that one day they will wake up, realize they can’t go on living another day without us, drop everything, profess their love for us and present us with a five carat diamond ring. 

I’m sorry, I know it sounds awful, but that’s just how I feel. And I know for a fact that I’m not alone on this.

In the meantime, Frank, if you need a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold and comfort you in this tough time, I just want you to know that I’m here for you! Call me!

Disclaimer: Miss Scarlett is well aware that Julie called dibs on him first. I would NEVER trespass on my girl’s property. You know what they say, sisters before misters! But a girl can dream, right?

September 13, 2010

The Bachelor Special

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 2:03 pm
Tags: , , ,

One of my favorite blogs had a rant post about dudes asking women to cook for them. It got me to reminiscing about when those “special” fellas in my life decided to cook for me for the very first time. I remember exactly what each one of them made. Why? Because they all made exactly the same thing! I call it “The Bachelor Special–” Chicken (boneless, bone-in, skinless, whatever…) smothered in Campbell’s Cream of Chicken/Mushroom/Celery soup. My first date in college made that dish the first time he cooked for me. Then my long-term college boyfriend. Then the dude after that. And my sister said her ex-husband served her that the first time as well. As did her previous boyfriend. I could go on and on, but I won’t!

Why do guys like to make this dish? Because it’s virtually foolproof. Just plop a can of soup on top of some chicken, add half a can of milk, bake at 400 for about 30 mins, et voila!!! It won’t dry out because it’s smothered in soup. It can’t burn. It comes out moist and tasty, I will admit… But I need dudes to get a little more creative in the kitchen. And no, I don’t mean sprinkling on some garlic or garnishing it with mushrooms y’all!

I guess some guy told his roommate who told his brother who grew up and told his son who told his roommate that this was a great dish and always impresses the ladies. Well fellas, we’re just impressed that you know how to work the oven and that you even tried to cook for us. And we’re great actresses. We will pretend like this is the greatest meal we have ever had… even though Jim, Bob & Steve all cooked it for us as well.

The last time a guy I was dating made me “The Bachelor Special,” I seriously got up, left the kitchen, went to the bathroom, laughed, and sent a text to my sister telling her what he was making. I called it “The Bachelor Special” in my text, and she immediately knew what I was referring to.

But y’all know I’m here to help, not hurt, so here are some suggestions for easy, delicious, and impressive recipes:

Simple Poached Salmon: Any time you cook with wine, we’re impressed! You can even use the leftover wine from the back of your fridge. You know, that wine served when you made Chicken a la Campbell’s the last time?

Quick Beef Burgundy: Again, cooking with wine! You can also call it by its’ French name “Boeuf Bourguignion” if you REALLY wanna impress her!

Pasta dishes are always easy and can be impressive. Tomato based sauces are easy to make. Just take some canned tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, oregano, and then throw in some veggies like eggplant or spinach and some chicken and there ya go! Or you can buy a high-end sauce, add chicken or shrimp. She’ll never know. But make sure it’s high end! Like the ones sold at specialty shops. I think we all know what Ragu & Prego taste like. And don’t forget you can always grill baby grill!

Finally guys, if all else fails, order takeout and garnish it nicely. Put a couple of pots on the stove and sprinkle in some garlic powder or onion so it smells like you’ve been slaving over a hot stove all day long. Just make sure you take the containers out to the dumpster before your date arrives!

Bon appetit! :-)

August 9, 2010

GUYS LOVE GIRLS WHO LOVE BALLS

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:19 am
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

carrie-stroup-football.jpgLadies, let me let you in on a little secret… Men actually find it sexy when a woman is into football. Why? Because they want you to have an interest in things they have interest in, and American football keeps their interest from August to February every year. That’s six months. Half a year! Girls, can you really go that long without ANY male companionship? I mean, games are on Sunday, Monday, Thursday and college games on Saturday and sometimes even Fridays! So if you want to spend time with guys, you’re going to have to watch a game or two with them every now and then.
Guys aren’t expecting you to know errything about football. I mean, you don’t need to know who the all time leading pass rusher is (it’s Deacon Jones by the way), but they would like you to know some of the basics of football. Let’s test your knowledge with what I call the FLEX: Football Literacy Exam. Get your pencils ready!

1) On the New England Patriots, Tom Brady (you know, Gisele’s hubby) is the one who throws the ball and runs the plays. What’s his position officially called?
      A) Quarterback
      B) Tight End
      C) Ball Handler

 Answer: While he may have a nice, tight end, Mr. Brady’s position is actually Quarterback. 

 2) During regular play, the quarterback throws the ball to the tight end (yes, that IS a real position!), he catches it in the end zone and scores. What is that score called?
      A) Homerun
      B) Touchdown
      C) Beer Time
 

Answer: Homerun is in baseball. Yeah, your man might celebrate by cracking open another beer, but Beer Time is also incorrect. The right answer is Touchdown.

 3) How many points does that tight end get for scoring that touchdown?
     A) 7
     B) 6
     C) 1

Answer: Oooh, this is a tricky one for beginners! The correct answer is 6. If the kicker and special teams make the field goal after, or point after touchdown, they’ll get another point, making a total of 7. I don’t know who’s bright idea it was to make it 6 points, but it is!

 4) What does “1st and 10” mean?
     A) The 1st down and 10 yards to go
     B) The 1st and 10th fans get a free beer
     C) The first team to score gets 10 points

 Answer: A. The offense (the side with the ball) gets four downs (or tries) to try to move the ball 10 yards so they can get another first down or a touchdown. If they only move 3 yards on the play, then the next drive is 2nd and 7. Two more yards, 3rd and 5. One more, 4th and 4. Then if the team doesn’t get a first down or score, the other team gets the ball. But I do like the 1st and 10th fans getting a free beer. We may need to run that by the NFL Commissioner.

 5) Who are the current Super Bowl Champions?
     A) New England Patriots
     B) Los Angeles Clippers
     C) New Orleans Saints

Answer: The Clippers are an NBA team. Not a very good NBA team, but an NBA team nonetheless. In my opinion, being a Boston native, it should have been the Patriots, but I’ll leave that one alone for now. The correct answer is C, the New Orleans Saints! Reggie Bush (aka Kim Kardashian’s ex) and crew won the 2010 Super Bowl over the Indianapolis Colts 31-17.

If you got all five answers right, good job! Now go take your knowledge to the nearest sports bar or your boyfriend’s basement and have a good time, enjoying the game, cheering for your favorite team and screaming at the left tackle for not covering the quarterback’s blind side (it’s not just a movie!).

 If you got two or three, cozy up next to an athletic cutie at the bar and ask him to explain a few things to you, the positions, why the game is important… But don’t ask a million questions. He does want to actually watch some of the games.

 If you missed all of them, well… There’s still hope for you. A number of NFL teams and college teams have workshops designed specifically for ladies, usually called “Football 101 for Women.” Check them out online. 

 And just one more thing… GO PATS!!!

This post originally appeared on The RAWBlog as a guest blog written by yours truly. Check out other guests bloggers from The RAWBlog’s Guest Blogger Week last week!

August 7, 2010

Guest Blog is Up

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 12:10 pm

Hey y’all! My piece as a guest blogger is up on The RAWBlog! Check it out!

August 6, 2010

RED ALERT!!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 11:43 am

Red Alert!!! Red Alert!!!

On Saturday, August 7th, yours truly will be a guest blogger on The RAWBlog. It’s part of his guest blogger week. It should be posted about 1pm. But don’t worry, your girl Miss Scarlett will let y’all know when it’s up! In the meantime, why not check out his blog and the other guest bloggers?

July 21, 2010

Best Cities for Singles

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:00 am
Tags: , , ,

Ok y’all, recently some folks at Yahoo! Travel compiled some data and after days and weeks in the lab, came up with a list of the top cities for singles. But you know your girl Miss Scarlett doesn’t agree with this list 100%. Some really are great for singles, but others need a big ole asterisk beside ‘em. Naw mean???

#1 New Orleans:

Yeah, you can’t really argue this one. A city that loves to party? And allows women to go topless in the French Quarter. (And ONLY the French Quarter! Try to stroll around all carefree one block away and you’ll get handcuffed… and not in the good way!) Plus the N.O. is the hub of Jazz and Blues, and there are plenty of places to chill and enjoy the sounds. Oh, and the Super Bowl Champs Saints. Not even Katrina or BP can stop the sizzling singles scene there. Down side: the scene is sizzling. LITERALLY! It’s uber hot and humid in the Crescent City! Keep the Frizz-Ease and Sweet Tea on hand! Phew!

#2 Miami:

Beaches, bikinis, buff bodies… Do I *REALLY* need to continue??? Didn’t think so. NEXT!!!

#3 Austin:

Yeeeeeeee Haaaaaawwww!!! Wrangle yourself up a cowboy or cowgirl (Miss Scarlett doesn’t judge!) in this hot Texas city! Austin has a kickin’ music scene (home to festivals like SXSW). It also boasts lots of great Tex-Mex food. I just suggest you take it easy on the beans if you plan on spitting game to some cuties. Or keep a Value Size bottle of Beano easily within reach!

#4 New York:

As a native of Bahstin, I’m going to put my hatred for the Yankees, Jets and Giants aside for the time being. What CAN’T you do in the concrete jungle where dreams are made of? There’s nothing you can’t do! (Ooh! Let me give credit to Miss Alicia Keys for that line!) But there may be a bit of sensory overload in the Big Apple. I have tons of friends there who are still single but are looking to couple up. Plus, Carrie and the girls from Sex and the City had an awful time trying to find their ideal mate. So maybe not the best to find a relationship, but great to hang out with the girls/guys at museums, shows, bars, festivals… Just have a great time.

Ok, now back to my normal Bostonian self… GO RED SOX!!! GO PATS!!! GO CELTICS!!! GO BROOOOONS!!!

#5 Las Vegas:

Yeah, this definitely ain’t the city to build lasting relationships. Well… with all the drive-thru wedding chapels… Maybe it is. But I wouldn’t bet on it! (Rim shot please!) Lots of places to meet hot singles looking for a good time. Clubs, shows, trendy pools. And hey, if you strike out at the bar, you can always head to the Champagne Room at a number of strip clubs! Just remember what Chris Rock said…

#6 Chicago:

Yeah, Chicago is my kind of town! I’ll tell you why Chi-town is so great for singles. Is it the music scene? While jazz & blues are king there, no. That ain’t it. Is it the food? While I do love deep dish pizza and the hot dogs there, that’s not it either! Is it Oprah? Naw. She’s not the Big O most singles are looking for. Ok, here’s why Chicago is so great for singles… Because it’s so freakin’ cold in the winter in the Windy City that you need someone to cuddle with to exchange body heat.

#7 Nashville:

The country music capital of the world! But there’s a lot more that makes Nashville a great city for singles. All kinds of music. Great food. Great sports. But don’t take my word for it– Just ask my good friend and native Nashvillian Rob of THE RAW BLOG.

#8 Houston:

It’s an up and coming city for professionals, is fairly close to the beaches of Gavelston, and is home to Beyonce. And you may be able to snag yourself a spaceman over at NASA… Just don’t get so infatuated that you drive cross country in an adult diaper to try and smack up his new chick… Allegedly!

#9 San Francisco:

Not too hot in the summer, not too cold in the winters… San Fran is GREAT for the hair and thus looking your best and landing Mr./Ms. Right. The great weather allows for lots of outdoorsy stuff– Bike riding, walking, rollerblading… None of which Miss Scarlett does! But it’s also great for picnics over by the Golden Gate bridge and by the Bay.

#10 Providence:

All I have to say about this pick is, REALLY??? I lived here for almost two years and, like I said, grew up not too far away in New England. Ok, so Boston-Lite (as I like to call it) IS great because there are LOTS of great restaurants and bars (Rhode Island is home to a great culinary school at Johnson & Wales), it’s very close to the beaches, has a great arts scene with RISD, and has the beautiful New England scenery. Ok, so maybe Providence IS a good city for singles. Just too bad I kept striking out! 

But I’ll let you decide. Check out Yahoo! Travel’s official list. Happy dating!

 

July 20, 2010

1,000!

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 3:05 pm

Hey readers!

Soon after posting my last post, “Videophone,” my blog got it’s 1,000th visitor! Woo hoo! :-D Thanks for following me over these last three months, and I hope you will stay with me as I continue on this wild roller coaster ride I call my life!

Oh, and to my 1,000th reader, sorry! You don’t win anything. Hey! This is a free, unsponsored blog! I have nothing to give away… Except my LOVE!!! LOL! ♥♥♥

Videophone

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 2:42 pm
Tags: , , , , , , ,

Dudes, why do you always ask us to get on the videophone? Especially if it’s the first time “meeting” us online? That is no bueno. Seriously. Why? Because we all aren’t Beyonce and don’t have perfect lighting and Diva Fans readily available!

Here’s why you can’t just ask a woman you just chatted with online or on the phone to do a videophone call:

1) When we meet you in person, we want to look our best. Hair perfectly curled, perfect lipstick, cover up those little blemishes, etc. If we’re talking to you on the phone or by IM, we most likely are in our big baggy sweats, rollers in our hair, and pimple cream slathered all over our faces.

2) The video quality is bad! It’s not the same as seeing us in person! Sometimes it’s grainy & pixellated. Most times it looks like someone’s smeared mayonnaise over the lens. I don’t care what brand, how high-tech or new fangled it is, it’s STILL not the same as seeing us live in person!

3) The lighting is awful! Unless you have a studio set up, videophones are often dark and create weird shadows. You need to give us some time to design a lighting set-up before we can converse.

4) 3-D things don’t look as good in 2-D. I’m a curvy girl. If you flatten my 3-D curves into just 2-D, I look extra wide. Plus it’s a known fact that cameras add 10 pounds.

Guys, it’s perfectly ok to ask us to chat via videophone after we’ve been out on a few dates. You know, after you’ve seen us at our best and maybe our date-acceptable-worst. You know, a fitted t-shirt and ponytail, and only wearing mascara. Seriously fellas, if the first time you saw us was in a poorly lit, grainy videophone with us looking a HOT mess, you’d NEVER wanna talk to us again!

Next Page »

The Rubric Theme. Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.