The Bachelor Special

One of my favorite blogs had a rant post about dudes asking women to cook for them. It got me to reminiscing about when those “special” fellas in my life decided to cook for me for the very first time. I remember exactly what each one of them made. Why? Because they all made exactly the same thing! I call it “The Bachelor Special–” Chicken (boneless, bone-in, skinless, whatever…) smothered in Campbell’s Cream of Chicken/Mushroom/Celery soup. My first date in college made that dish the first time he cooked for me. Then my long-term college boyfriend. Then the dude after that. And my sister said her ex-husband served her that the first time as well. As did her previous boyfriend. I could go on and on, but I won’t!

Why do guys like to make this dish? Because it’s virtually foolproof. Just plop a can of soup on top of some chicken, add half a can of milk, bake at 400 for about 30 mins, et voila!!! It won’t dry out because it’s smothered in soup. It can’t burn. It comes out moist and tasty, I will admit… But I need dudes to get a little more creative in the kitchen. And no, I don’t mean sprinkling on some garlic or garnishing it with mushrooms y’all!

I guess some guy told his roommate who told his brother who grew up and told his son who told his roommate that this was a great dish and always impresses the ladies. Well fellas, we’re just impressed that you know how to work the oven and that you even tried to cook for us. And we’re great actresses. We will pretend like this is the greatest meal we have ever had… even though Jim, Bob & Steve all cooked it for us as well.

The last time a guy I was dating made me “The Bachelor Special,” I seriously got up, left the kitchen, went to the bathroom, laughed, and sent a text to my sister telling her what he was making. I called it “The Bachelor Special” in my text, and she immediately knew what I was referring to.

But y’all know I’m here to help, not hurt, so here are some suggestions for easy, delicious, and impressive recipes:

Simple Poached Salmon: Any time you cook with wine, we’re impressed! You can even use the leftover wine from the back of your fridge. You know, that wine served when you made Chicken a la Campbell’s the last time?

Quick Beef Burgundy: Again, cooking with wine! You can also call it by its’ French name “Boeuf Bourguignion” if you REALLY wanna impress her!

Pasta dishes are always easy and can be impressive. Tomato based sauces are easy to make. Just take some canned tomatoes, olive oil, garlic, oregano, and then throw in some veggies like eggplant or spinach and some chicken and there ya go! Or you can buy a high-end sauce, add chicken or shrimp. She’ll never know. But make sure it’s high end! Like the ones sold at specialty shops. I think we all know what Ragu & Prego taste like. And don’t forget you can always grill baby grill!

Finally guys, if all else fails, order takeout and garnish it nicely. Put a couple of pots on the stove and sprinkle in some garlic powder or onion so it smells like you’ve been slaving over a hot stove all day long. Just make sure you take the containers out to the dumpster before your date arrives!

Bon appetit! 🙂

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A whole lotta fish!

Y’all know your girl Miss Scarlett’s got the skillz to pay da billz!  Buuuuutttt… That’s getting harder and harder each day as we’re in this “Great Recession.” I needed to go to the grocery store today, so instead of doing as I used to and just blindly going to the nearest supermarket, I browse the ads online and plan my strategy. Now, I’m no Frugalista, but I know a great deal when I see one. So when I saw “Name Brand Solid White Albacore Tuna – $0.88 – Limit 24,” I grabbed my purse, grabbed my keys, and hit the store! Yes, this means your girl will be eating tuna for the rest of Lent through Christmas– And I’m not even Catholic!

I’ve already gone through several tuna recipes in my mind: tuna salad, tuna noodle casserole, teriyaki tuna (basically dumping tuna in the packaged lo mein noodles and adding extra soy sauce  or teriyaki sauce). But I wanted to share with you one of my mother’s favorite recipes. I made it for her once for Mother’s Day, and it’s a great, impressive recipe, but very cheap. I mean, $1.76 for the meat for 2 people? Can’t beat that!

Tuna Van Ziti

Sauce:

One 12 oz can of diced tomatoes
1/4 – 1/2 cup of Extra Virgin Olive Oil
1/2 teaspoon Basil
1 teaspoon Crushed Garlic
Salt to taste
One small jar (4 oz I think?) of Marinated Artichokes (lightly rinsed)
1 small Lemon
2 cans of Solid White Albacore Tuna (or use fresh tuna steaks if you’re ballin’)

Pasta:
1 box of Rigatoni or Ziti (cooked as according to directions on package)

Directions:
Add tomatoes, oil & spices to a pot. Bring to a gentle boil. Reduce to a simmer. Add artichokes. Let simmer for at least an hour, or  ideally let sit in fridge overnight. Add lemon (return sauce to heat if chilled). Add tuna. Serve over pasta with parmesan cheese, if desired.

 

For the record, I’m no Emeril, more like Rachael Ray. I don’t typically measure the items, I just add judging by my eyes & tastes. But I hope you enjoy this recipe! Buon Appetito! 🙂