The Scarlett Letter

September 23, 2010

Status Update

Filed under: Uncategorized — missscarlett19 @ 9:42 am
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The other night, I was Skyping one of my friends. In the middle of me telling Julie on my big score at the sales rack, she suddenly starts beaming. Sure, I was excited to save 85% on my buys, but I never expected Julie to be that excited!

“I’m sorry,” Julie says, still grinning from ear to ear, “I just checked Facebook and it says this guy I had a crush on back in the day is now SINGLE!”

“Who is it?” I ask.


I too break out with a huge Chesire Cat reminiscent grin. Oh, I remembered Frank well. Julie knows I had a crush on Frank, as did a number of other women in the office at our first job. Tall, muscular, emerald eyes, dark chocolate hair… But I digress.

Without pausing for a beat, I open my browser and go to Facebook to see if what Julie said is true. There it is. A little pink heart. Right beneath the words “Frank Smith is now single.” Julie and I exchange fist pumps (Yeah, time to turn off Jersey Shore!).

But then it hit me, was it wrong to celebrate while Frank may be in sorrow? I remember stalking looking at pictures of Frank happily hugged up with his unbelievably cute and sexy blonde girlfriend. Those pictures were up for at least a year. Frank may be crying into a glass of Jack Daniels while Julie and I are doing the Cabbage Patch in celebration of his newly found singledom.

Why do we find such joy in someone’s sorrow? Simple! Because it allows us to reignite fantasies about that person. Hoping that one day they will wake up, realize they can’t go on living another day without us, drop everything, profess their love for us and present us with a five carat diamond ring. 

I’m sorry, I know it sounds awful, but that’s just how I feel. And I know for a fact that I’m not alone on this.

In the meantime, Frank, if you need a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold and comfort you in this tough time, I just want you to know that I’m here for you! Call me!

Disclaimer: Miss Scarlett is well aware that Julie called dibs on him first. I would NEVER trespass on my girl’s property. You know what they say, sisters before misters! But a girl can dream, right?


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